What To Do When Your Friends Are Getting Married and Having Kids...
June 25, 2017
Am I The Only One whose friends are married and having kids? Of course not, that's all of our friends! Just last weekend on Father's Day, my dad and granddad were grilling me on why I wasn't married yet. Like what answer are they expecting, lol. So what do you do when your not ready to go down that road just yet? Check out some of my petty but productive tips, to deal with the pressures from your family and friends to start a family.
1.Mind your business
I'm not a wife or a mom, so I really stray away from giving advice or even commenting on the subject. I honestly feel like those titles are sacred, and you should speak from experience when discussing them. This will save you from a lot of awkward conversations, that you don't have any output on.
2. Don't let FOMO, get you in sticky situations.
The fear of missing out is a real thing! Friends, I know our loved ones have beautiful kids, amazing weddings, and cute IG pictures.
But y'all should just be happy for them, it's not a competition. Don't rush your love story trying to keep up with people, that's how you get stuck in sticky situations.
3. Focus on yourself, and what's meant for you will come.
I know, I know you've heard this a million times. But it's true! When you put that spare energy you use comparing yourself to others back into you. Watch things fall into place, you might even meet bae right after wards. (No promises tho, lol)
Single friends, how do you deal with the pressure?
Am I The Only One that feels like everyone is settling down and creating families? Before you raise an eyebrow, I know I've been in a pretty committed relationship for some years now. Being in a long-term relationship often leads to the following questions:
"So, when are you guys getting married?"
"What are you all waiting on?"
"When do you planning on having kids?"
I often respond by asking, "You got kids and marriage money?" Okay, maybe not that. But that's what I want to say. If the questions above are all too familiar for you, try keeping these tips in mind:
1. Everyone peaks on their own time.
Seeing your friends creating their own families can often make you feel like you're behind the curve. When I feel like this I remind myself of all the successful women that married and had kids at an older age (ex. Viola Davis, Tyra Banks and even my mom). Some people peak later than others and when your time comes it'll be just as fulfilling.
2. Fall in love with your passions and make your own baby.
While you're waiting for Mr. or Mrs. Right, use this time to focus on something that makes you happy. It could be creating your own business, traveling, going to school or whatever hobby you choose. You can never go wrong by investing in yourself and by investing in things that bring you happiness.
3. Your story may be different from everyone else's.
You don't have to follow the theory that society has created - the one that says everyone should get married and have kids. Maybe your purpose in life is to travel across the world and educate those in under privileged countries or your purpose is to lead in government. That doesn't mean you can't have a successful career and a family, but realize that your purpose in life could be different from being a parent and spouse.
Friends, do you feel a little left behind when others are getting married and having kids. If so, how do you cope?