I’m back and I’m 26 now, and not so clueless. It’s crazy how much can change in one short year! Y’all my life is completely different, I’ve been diving all into my passion of media and communications. Literally right after I posted 25 and clueless, I started working at my now company (funny right). In addition to that, I’ve gotten the chance to work on a few very cool freelance projects, moved back to the city and finally got my passport (I know I’m late)! But with all that career and professional bliss, something else changed. I wasn’t dating, like at ALL. Which honestly I didn’t notice at first, because I’m always swamped at work so it wasn’t in the front of my mind. But once my friends bought it to my attention, it made me stop and think. This is the first time in my adult life where I haven’t had a constant man in my life, and I started to think about why that is. So after mowing over this question, I came up with the top 3 reasons.
I’m exhausted! Seriously y’all, I work a 9-5 that includes nights and weekends. I’m always on call, and my schedule changes at the drop of a dime. When I have time to myself, I like to chill and have some me-time. The biggest problem I’ve found with dating and my schedule, is guys feel like their put on the back burner. Example, I was supposed to meet a man for dinner at 7. I planned to be done with work by 6, that didn’t happen so I made it way later than I planned. Granted, I communicated my situation but he was so upset with me. Which annoyed me, so needless to say we ain’t work. But I run into this all the time!
Patience is thinnnnn
I have very thin patience, but just to be clear I’ve ALWAYS been like this. I know what you’re saying, “patience is a virtue”. Noted, however men go in circles and I’m a straight shooter. I hate wasting my time, trying figure out what you trying say/do when you can literally just tell me. I know great things take time, but it’s like how much time?? (lol) In the same vein as being impatient, I’ve ran into men who make mistakes in our courtship and refuse to acknowledge it. Like you’re wrong, ADMIT it. It honestly be the smallest things, like “rescheduling a date” and because you want to be prideful I’m annoyed and over you and the situation.
Different View Points
This is the hardest one! I’ve met men who on paper were “perfect”, then we started to talk and suddenly those butterflies went away. Example, I was talking to a man about the Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian situation. Now, by no means are they the most wholesome couple or “role models”. But listen, wrong is wrong and respect is respect. Your common
courtesy towards women shouldn’t change based on the woman, and it just really rubs me the wrong way when guys stand up and protect men when they are dead wrong. And not just wrong, but straddling the line of abuse. Like ok, tell me how you really feel. It’s a major disappointment that most times black women are expected to rally and support black men (which I’m down too do), but don’t return that same fierce support, respect and protection.
So friends, you see why I’m single. Am I tripping or are my points valid?